ACCEPTANCE...

IS SOMETHING WE ALL WANT. IT FEELS GOOD TO BE WANTED AND WHEN SOMEONE LETS US "IN" IT BRINGS TO A WARMTH FEELING TO OUR SOULS. I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT CHILDREN RELIED ON ACCEPTANCE MORE THAN ADULTS, BUT MY PERCEPTION OF THIS IDEA WAS FOREVER CHANGED TONIGHT. AS ALWAYS, CAIDEN, BAILEE AND I SAT ON MY BED TALKING , WE DO THIS EVERY NIGHT BEFORE WE GO TO BED. WE TALK ABOUT THE DAY WE HAVE HAD,AND IT GIVES US A CHANCE TO SEE EACH ONES THOUGHTS OF THE DAY THEY HAD. I ALWAYS LET THE KNOW THAT I AM SORRY FOR THE THINGS THAT I HAVE PUT THEM THROUGH, THAT MOMMY WAS GOING THOUGH A BAD PHASE, AND THAT I WOULD DO WHATEVER IT TOOK TO MAKE OUR FAMILY WHOLE AGAIN. CAIDEN, AS USUAL, AMAZES ME WITH THE ANALOGY HE USED TO DESCRIBE THE SITUATION. HE TOLD ME THIS" MOMMY, ITS KINDA LIKE BASEBALL, YOU STRIKE OUT SOMETIMES, BUT YOU KEEP TRYING, AND YOU GIVE IT ALL YOU CAN, AND YOU LEAVE KNOWING THAT YOU GAVE IT YOUR BEST, YOU MAKE MISTAKES, BUT YOU CAN HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE TO PROVE THAT YOU CAN DO IT." HE WAS GIVING ME "CONFIRMATION" THAT NO MATTER WHAT MISTAKES I MAKE, THEY WILL "ACCEPT" ME AS THEIR MOTHER. THEY HAVE REALIZED THE ERRORS OF MY WAYS, BUT THEY KNOW THAT MY "INTENTIONS" ARE ALWAYS OF THE BEST OF THEM, AND THEY FORGIVE ME FOR WHAT I HAVE DONE. WE SHOULD REALLY LOOK AT EVERYDAY SITUATION'S THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD. THEY ARE A LOT MORE CAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING SITUATIONS THAT WE GIVE THEM CREDIT FOR. MY CHILDREN HAVE ACCEPTED MY FAILURES AND THEY LOOK AT THEM NOW, AS GOD'S WAY OF GETTING RID OF THE BAD THINGS SO I WOULD BE ABLE TO LEAN MORE ON GOD THAN MYSELF. GOD WANTED TO GET RID OF THE OLD, AND BRING IN THE NEW. I NOW SEE THAT WE AS ADULTS NEED TO FEEL ACCEPTED BECAUSE IT PLEASES OUR SELF-INSECURITIES .ACCEPTANCE SOMEWHAT FILLS THAT LITTLE VOID OF BEING SINGLE OUT. WE FEEL THAT "BELONGING" GIVES US A SENSE OF SELF-SECURITY.CHILDREN LOOK TO THIS AS BEING WAY TOO COMPLICATED. CHILDREN JUST NEED ACCEPTANCE OF THEIR PARENTS: THAT THEY ARE LOVED AND WANTED, AND APPRECIATED. BAILEE OFTEN EXPRESSES HER SELF THROUGH DRAWINGS. SHE HAS AN EXPECTATIONAL IMAGINATION, AND SHE AMAZES ME WITH IMAGINES THAT SHE VISUALLY SEES THROUGH HER EYES AND HEART. SHE IS SO EXCITED ABOUT HER DADDY COMING HOME . SHE DREW THIS TONIGHT. HER PRECIOUS HEART FEELS OUR FAMILY WILL BE "WHOLE" AGAIN SOON.SHE GAVE ME "CONFIRMATION" TONIGHT THAT ACCEPTANCE" LIES WITHIN THE ABILITY TO FORGIVE, AND MOVE ON TO NEW POSSIBILITIES THAT WILL ONLY MAKE US MORE CLOSE AS A FAMILY. I SEE NOW THAT MY ACCEPTANCE LIES WITHIN MY FAMILIES THOUGHTS OF ME, NOT ANYONE ELSE. SHE SEES ALL POTENTIAL WE HAVE AS A WHOLE, WE ARE NOT ONE PERSON SEEKING LIFE'S ADVENTURES, BUT WE ARE 4 PEOPLE, ON 4 DIFFERENT JOURNEYS, BUT WE EXPERIENCE IT TOGETHER, HELPING EACH OTHER AS WE GO.